Millard Fillmore's time to shine

So we all know about Lincoln and the penny and I probable don't need to even mention his monopolistic control of it from his after life copper palace high atop Mt Olympus, but now it come to my attention that they want to put a new face on them ending his almost a century of tourney and I say more power to ya.
But now if this happens it's time to try to put another creepy ghost of the White House to the penny's façade and I say lets use Millard Fillmore because not all that much is known about his term in office and what is known is shrouded in mystery.
Millar Fillmore rose to power after the ill-fainted Zachary Taylor died in office after serving less the six months then the seemingly young robust fifty three year old Millard Fillmore took the reigns of power in the strongest seat in the world, a seat that Millard was comfortable in because he had served as King of England some two hundred years earlier, also some 362 and a half years before that he was King of the Byzantine empire and also he served as a milk maid for Cleopatra and easily held a hundred other persona across the annals of history .Yes you guessed it Millard Fillmore was a Nuesvertue, the walking un-dead a Vampire but not in the story book fantasy sense he was the Real McCoy and could very much go out in the day light as well as eat garlic and he could polymorph, that is change his physical body but into a bat instead to a squirrel . Little is said about this Vampire Lord turned politician term in office al though he was the first President to institute the take "a penny leave a penny policy" which at the time was a joke because penny then were giant hunks of stone weighing at roughly two hundred pounds later they would be changed (after a long legal battle that ended with the Spanish American war and the establishment of Broke Back Mountain Range) in to the change, we are accustom with now. Other great accomplishments of his persistency is that the earth much to the chagrin of it invaders was not taken over buy aliens no this vampire used a powerful army of the of sea creatures called fourth buy mystical plumbers who just happened to be on hand instilling indoor pluming in the White House, or that what my Grandpa told me when I was young
For these many reasons (all of which are true) makes him the best choice for the new penny's.